So it seems vampires can eat food!
Fat Vampire by Johnny B. Truant
Serendipity is a funny thing. I stumbled across Fat Vampire while playing an online game called Judgey. With all the buff, sparkly vampires running around I thought the idea of an obese vampire would be awesome.
I was right. From Chapter 1 (intriguingly entitled “Asshole”) I was hooked. A 350-pound treadmill salesman is stuck in his miserable, tedious life, being tortured by the office bully, self-comforting with pizza and donuts . . . until he’s turned by the weird Goth kid in the office who happens to be a vampire.
It was short, funny, and fascinating. I loved it so much I clicked on Fat Vampire 2 the second I finished the first one.
Pairing
Fat Vampire pairs well with this gorgeous handmade Samurai sword, in honour of the sword the vampire Maurice keeps hanging from his belt.
As well as a 40-pack of Cheetos, because they lied to you when they said vampires can’t eat human food. They can: they just can’t digest it. Happy, happy Reginald. He can feed his food fetish and not gain a pound.
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Hi, I recently read your post about the critique you will be giving out. I feel my writing is very choppy and the character development is too fast. But I do not know how to fix it. Please get back to this as quickly as you can. Thanks!
Here it is:
It’s funny how you can feel on the top of the school one year, then get crushed by reality the next. Eyes surrounded her closely, observing her every move. Whispers suffocate her anger. Ever since she teased a girl named Kim, this happened. What made her so special from the others? She clenched her fist. Just because Kim got a little prettier, doesn’t mean she’s not the same nerd she’s always been. “ Isn’t that the girl who bullied Kim? “ A voice echoed in her head. A tint of guilt touched her shoulder. She shook it off and walked faster. Soon everyone will realize that she’s just a worthless brat. Brix slammed the door of the classroom open. Heads turned at her. Blushing, she bowed her head and slipped into her desk.
Click. Brix tapped her finger on the backside of her pen and thought. It wasn’t her fault Kim hated her; she was innocent. Click. Was she? Maybe she shouldn’t have called her those names – or said those things, but she was just telling the truth. Click. She heard a snicker from behind her, “Wow, Brix is really thinking about that math problem. She’s finally thinking about what she’s doing before she does it.” Brix felt frozen with rage. Her throat went numb daring her to speak. A thousand scattered snickers spread across the room. This must have been how Kim felt. She bit her lip in regret. Brix was the same as Kim, hiding behind a crowd. But she was different now. She would fight for herself instead of being crushed by them. Mustering every last bit herself, she raised her voice, “I get it,” she swallowed her thick saliva. “ what I did was horrible. But all of you are doing the same thing; spreading rumors, teasing me, and talking behind my back. Don’t you feel bad? Don’t you feel guilty?” The class abruptly became silent. Am wave of tension thickened the atmosphere. All that was heard were the writing of pencils. After a few minutes of awkward silence, the teacher stepped into the mute class, “ I’m back.” she paused “Well aren’t y’all very quiet…”
Students restlessly count the second for class to end. A loud ‘ring’ pierces through the anticipation of the students. Suddenly, students rush to beat the swarm of students. Brix shoved her supplies into her bag and headed for the door. A hand wrapped around her wrist as she moved to leave. Brix’s eyes moved followed the hand to the face. Tiffany, Kim’s best friend, stood in front of her. Brix frowned as a river of people circled around them. “Hey, I just wanted to say what you told the class was really brave.” She stammered “A-And… I thought about what I was doing and realized it wasn’t right. So I thought if you could change… then maybe… “ Tiffany looked up “ I could.” Then suddenly the day went by so fast.
Brix walked down the whispering halls. Eyes made fun of her every move, step, breath. But this time she stood up straight and smiled. It’s funny how you can be crushed by society by one simple reason; listening to them.
Thank you! I’ll get back to you on it soon, ok?